Thursday, August 7, 2008

YET MORE WHEATGRASS

Oh my god, it keeps going.

21 Wheatgrass Juice cures acne and even help to remove scars after it has been ingested for seven to eight months. The diet must be improved at the same time.

Okay, so wheatgrass causes this effect as long as you do this other action that is known to cause the same effect. Hey, if you buy my lucky pennies you are guaranteed to win the lottery. You must have a winning lottery ticket for them to work.

22 Wheatgrass juice acts as a detergent in the body and is used as a body deodorant.

If you like smelling like mud, I suppose. Hippies. And again, they're harping on this detoxification thing. Detoxification is a myth. You don't need it. It doesn't fix or improve anything and it costs you money. Give me money if you want to be rid of it so badly. I'm at least honest.

23 A small amount of wheatgrass juice in the human diet helps prevents tooth decay.

There's that word again. "Helps". You kind get the feeling it helps like a three year old helps his dad fix a car.

24 Wheatgrass juice held in the mouth for 5 minutes will help eliminate toothaches. It pulls poisons from the gums.

GOOD LORD YOU HAVE POISON IN YOUR GUMS, RUN! Come on, seriously? What poison? Name it. Again, note the use of the word "help". One begins to wonder why, if this stuff cures toothaches, acne and parasitic vaginal infections, on top of granting immortality to rabbits, we don't bathe in it daily. Which is more likely: that there's a vast conspiracy of evil doctors desperately trying to hide this elixir of life from us in protection of their own pocketbooks, or that this stuff really doesn't do anything?

25 Gargle Wheatgrass Juice for a sore throat.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that would give me a sore throat. That stuff is nasty.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Not sure why are you so hard on wheatgrass. I have seen amazing things happen to people that drink wheatgrass on a regular basis and are on a raw food diet.

GWD said...

The snake oil salesman wants us to know that snake oil works. See my response post titled "Why Am I So Hard On Wheatgrass?"